I shake when I talk

I shake when I talk to you, like
one leaf in ten thousand afraid to fall.
My hands are shaking when I sip my wine
(you can see it, I know you do), and
my grin is shaky and my words crack
in the cogs of my mind because I am
thinking thinking through the many things to
say and not say and unsay — what did you
say? would you repeat yourself I’m sorry
I wasn’t listening while I was listening for
you telling me I was probably wrong or being silly
or if you’re nice you’ll just scrunch your brow
and sip and nod and I will know for sure
what I’ve suspected all along: I’m not
good enough for this conversation or for
you so I’ll be quiet now and sip my wine over there
over there and shake and think about what went wrong
and why, among ten thousand thousand leaves,
I was always the one destined to fall.